5:20 am is early no matter what time zone you're in

If you're not excited about sports this season you have about as much life in you as Luciano Pavarotti...or me at 5:23 am. The Red Sox are on their way to the World Series and the Pats are striving to go undefeated this season (without cheating). What does this have to do with the people not from Massachusetts that read my blog? Nothing, I guess. You can turn right around and proceed to hell. For those concerned with the overall well being of humanity, the rapture has cometh to Cleveland in the form of the New York Yankees. A swarm of bugs? Tonight, Lake Erie will be red...and not from Red Tide because of the disgusting amounts algae, but rather the plagues of 0-rod and his impending October suck. Why do Boston fans still want to sign this guy:



Oh...wait a second...this guy:



?

Because he puts up flashy numbers during the regular season? You're basically paying $252 million dollars to have your hopes and dreams built up over 162 games and then have them come crashing down in a week every year. Only if there was no rules baseball would he be a good acquisition for the Sox.



All this talk about Pay-rod and the Yankees dumps a huge load on my excitement. Today the Sox face Jered Weaver who has never won against Boston. All the experts are saying that doesn't matter because Weaver has "momentum" coming into the playoffs. Whatever...if the first two games weren't demoralizing enough to this Angels team...surely Papi's numbers against Weaver will thwart any confidence they may have had. But...you can always pitch around Papi to get to a struggling Manny because that never blows up in your face.



The Angels are crippled (Gary Mathews Jr is out, Vladimir Guerrero was pulled from Friday's game, and Garret Anderson's right eye is swollen), but I can guarantee this win today will bring more satisfaction to Sox Nation than if they really played a bunch of handicapped players. Before I fall back asleep, I need to mention that the Colts may lose today and the Pats should definitely win. The Colts already shitty defense will be without Bob Sanders and Rob Morris, Peyton won't have his man-bitch Marvin Harrison, and running back Joseph Addai will be missing in action like Chuck Norris. The Pats, however, are getting stronger because Rodney Harrison is back. So advice for Derek Anderson, don't make your receivers cross the middle of the field...Rodney Harrison will find them. A big LOL @ those who call the Browns "surprisingly potent"...they're still as impotent as we all wish Tom Cruise was. They beat the Bengals and Ravens who they always play hard. Big deal. Alright, updates tonight, I need sleep.